Gotta Secret, Can Ya Keep It?
by Madame Fuentes
Summary: Hi, I'm Kagami Taiga. And I fuck the Generation Of Miracles. AU KagamixGoM Slight KagaKuro Definite smut up ahead! Yaoi boyxboy
1. Prologue

**Prologue **

Secrets. I absolutely hate them. Just as much as I hate the goddamn word. Secrets are fucking present payback for bullshit you've done in the past. Just little dirty things, things that people want to bring up to get back at your ass. It makes no sense to me. None whatsoever.

When it comes to secrets, it's the fact that you know something so downright awful or dirty or whatever about yourself, that you just NEED to tell someone. But what happens when you do? Just the opposite of what you wanted. Just the goddamn opposite, it leads to one person to the next and then finally you're gonna have to pop the glock make a brain slushie on whoever knows.

But my secret. MY secret was always safe with me.

Then how the fuck, did it get out? That's all I want to know! I didn't tell anyone, no one knew. No one.

...except..

Kuroko Tetsuya.

He knew. He knew. And I was dumb enough to trust him. Someone with a lack of presence can really get around can't he?


	2. One Abrupt End, is Another's New Start

"Oh...Kagami-kun, please..wait..." The bluenette beneath Kagami breathed heavily, eyes lidded, and body heaving. Kagami kissed him lightly, waiting for Kuroko to adjust to his thick size.

Kagami looked to the side and sighed, "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea Kuroko..."

Said blunette's arms flung themselves around Kagami's neck, unrelenting to let go. "No, I'm okay. I really wanted it to be you who took my virginity." The usual expressionless, lack of presence boy, now had teary eyes of love and commitment.

"So please, Kagami-kun. Please." He buried his face into the redhead's neck and breathed heavily. Kagami kept a slow pace, making sure he didn't harm his shadow, attempting to give pleasure to the one he loved most.

A few thrusts in and Kuroko was a heaving mess. Moaning out everything, from "Ahh, yes! Faster Kagami-kun!" to "Ah Kagami-kun, please fuck me harder!". Basically anything, and everything along the lines of that.

Until those three words, Kuroko was dreading came out of Taiga's mouth.

"Kuroko-kun..I love you.."

_Sorry. I don't Kagami-kun. _

"I...Kagami...I...love you too..." The uneasy feeling of lying settled into Kuroko's stomach and once again, he felt a building up in his lower abdomen area.

"Nngh..Kuro..I'm..."

"Go...ahead! A-ah!" They orgasmed together, Kagami soon pulling out to wrap the bluenette in his arms. The redhead gently wrapped his arms around Kuroko kissing his forehead, mumbling the forbidden words that the blunette dreaded to hear.

In all reality, Kuroko loved Kagami. With all his heart. But his past relationships were never of love but lust. And therefore, Kuroko locked up his heart, deeming himself to never love again.

Until a certain redheaded American boy came into his life. The locks on his heart fell to the ground and clanked loudly in his mind once he saw Kagami. But he soon felt doubt all over again.

He didn't want to fall in love, no. Because he'd only mistake lust for love. And when he did, he'd end up heart broken, and depressed that someone he loved would only use him for a fuck toy.

It was a painful process he went through multiple times with multiple boys and girls. And he hated it with a certain disgust. A disgust that made him want to rip his own throat out, just to get rid of the taste.

As for Kagami, the situation was all but the same.

In his reality, of course Kagami loved Kuroko. The blunette warmed his heart immensely whenever he saw him, and could do nothing but smile when he was around. Kagami wouldn't mistake lust for love. He simply did not know what love was. But as his spare time was spent with Kuroko, he realized what it was. And came to the silly conclusion, that he was in fact in love with his shadow.

Glances of slight interest became stares of total love.

Those stares of total love then became slight interaction.

Slight interaction became heavy.

And heavy interaction led to their first kiss.

A kiss full of honesty, true feelings, and in Kagami's young mind, love.

But in Kuroko's, it was a kiss full of lies, lust, abusiveness, and more broken hearts that he certainly did not need. But what could he do, as conflicted as he was. It was true that he too was in love with Kagami, but the other half of him told him the same words over and over.

_Stop. You'll end up heart broken again. Stop._

But Kuroko ignored his mind, more willing to follow his heart more than anything else.

But we're only human. And humans make mistakes. But Kuroko never realized how deep of a mistake he made when sealing his love for Kagami with a kiss.

_"We're moving to America!" His mother said happily. Kuroko only turned his head. "A..merica?" _

_His mother nodded enthusiastically. "2 months and we're gone!" _

Unlike his mother at the time, Kuroko was very unhappy. He'd just fallen in love with the boy of his dreams, and been with him for almost a year. And now he leaves? Just when things were turning out alright. His love life comes crashing down on him.

And that's how we see Kuroko now. Laying beside a sweaty Kagami, who quickly fell asleep.

"America.." He mumbled. He sat up, the redhead's arms dropping off to the side. Grabbing a paper and pen, he climbed out of Kagami's bed scribbling down the whole situation. He left for America, 9 o clock sharp. Not like he'd write that, he didn't want to bare seeing Kagami cry as he left.

_Kagami-kun,_

_I'm sorry to say this. But I left last night. I just had too. Today is the day I leave for America, and I will not tell you when I am leaving. I can not bare to see you after this abrupt situation happens. _

_Thank you for all you given in this past year, but I must go. _

_And I'm afraid I'm not coming back. _

_~Kuroko_

And with that said, Kuroko slipped out of Kagami's house into the night, to prepare himself for what was to happen tomorrow.


	3. Fate's A Bitch

Yuki Rivaille - thank you so much. To answer your question on the pairings, it's past!Kagakuro and KagamixGoM

Its a bit of both as it works it way through flashbacks and what not.

* * *

_And now he's gone. _

The four words circle my head as they have been for the last 10 years. Kuroko's gone. He's been gone for a while now ever since that fateful night. Love was confessed and I gave him my everything. My heart, my soul. And he just threw it away.

I took my coffee from the waitress, thanking her and giving a generous tip. A grande white chocolate mocha, non fat, light on the fucking whip. I took a sip. Perfection. I glanced out the window of the small coffee shop I was at, thinking deeply of going home.

Back home to Japan. To my loves, to all of them. Shi-shi, Kise, Ahomine, Midori, and Mura-Mura. That purple headed idiot. He was an adorable purple headed idiot, so I couldn't complain.

But before I went home, I had to finish my book I was currently working on. A novel, about a lost boy, looking for a more fun, intriguing life. So he went from Japan to America and lived the life. But paid a deep price with it, death to be precise.

I sighed. _I'm never gonna finish this. _

"Age 26, a successful author and yet I still have writers' block. Fuck me.." I shook my head, glancing back at my laptop. All I need to do is finish the last few pages, turn it in before the deadline, get feedback, and BAM! I'll be home free to return to my Miracles.

Sadly, that was the problem. I never do meet the deadlines, so everything gets pushed back, as far as it can go, and the price I pay is having to spend more and more time away from home. I do make up for it with my books being sold so well all over the world, so I could say money isn't the main issue.

But that's beside the point. The real fact of the matter is that I need to finish these pages and get everything in. So I can just go home!

I turn to my laptop again, fingers on the keys. _Write Kagami, write!_

After staring furiously at my screen, eyebrows knitted in frustration, I close my laptop (not without saving everything of course). I take my bag and leave the shop, coffee in hand. I walk down the sidewalk, enjoying the sights and sound of New York City. The Big Apple. I've always wanted to come here. It was a dream of mine when I was younger. I remember taking about this trip with the boys.

* * *

"I won't allow it.."

"But Akashi, this is my one and only opportunity!"

"Kagami, what will we do if you're hurt? We will be of no aid if something happens to you."

I rolled my eyes. Akashi being protective as ever.

"I'm 26 years old damn it! I can take care of myself!" My hands were on my hips, and my forehead knitted up in protest.

His stare bore into my but I was relentless.

"Kagami Taiga, you're not going to America! That is final!"

"I am going! You can't stop me!" I yelled back. I turned my back to him and his hands slammed onto the table.

"I honestly think Kagamicchi should go, Akashicchi." Oh thank god! Kise, who's forever and will always be on my side. He landed a small kiss on my cheek and smirked as I blushed.

"If he's writing a book on an American boy, then it makes sense for him to go back to America." For that, I gave Kise a kiss of approval. He smiled brightly excited by the kiss.

Akashi shut his eyes, hand on his forehead, the newly induced stress coming over him. He quickly pryed me from Kise's hold, dragging to me Midori's room.

"Midorima, open up." A few shuffles came from behind the door along with Midori's grumbling.

"What is it?" He asked, pushing his glasses up.

"Suitcase, now." Midori turned slowly opening up his second closet by the door and pulling out a dark green suitcase.

Before giving it up, he asked, "What for?"

"Kagami's trip to America." Midori nodded before giving up the suitcase and handing it to Akashi. He then turned to me with a stern look on his face.

"You are to communicate in any way you can every night, do you hear? If not I'll take it upon myself to do something about it." I smiled widely and nodded franctically. Finally, Akashi is trusting my trips! I was so excited, I turned around on my heel, but was grabbed back again.

"Huh?"

"Be careful sweetheart. We love you too much to risk anything happening to you." And with that Akashi, left to the den area downstairs where Murasakibara, Kise and Aomine were watching Ted.

* * *

After that night, I left early the next morning for my flight. I promised them I'd be staying only a week, but I've been here three now. I sighed as I opened the door to my mothers' house.

"Mom! I'm home!" God, I felt like I was back in middle school. Coming through the door from a shitty day at school, ready to tell her everything.

I got no response when I called again. My bottomless pit of a stomach grumbled and I quickly went into the kitchen. Searching the fridge I found the curry I made for us last night, along with a note on the microwave as I popped my plate in there.

_Kagami, _

_Mommy had another business trip to leave for. I should be home before you leave, but if not, I love you and have a safe trip back home. Tell the boys I said hi, and lockup the house when you leave. _

_Love, _

_Mommy Taiga (RAWR!)_

I laughed lightly. Fifty-two and still going on business trips, mom you've always amazed me. I took my plate into the living room, turning on the flat screen and kickin my feet up on the coffee table. I changed the channel to an NBA game and began watching it.

Hm, Boston Celtics versus Miami Heat. If Ahomine were here, he'd be bragging about how much American teams supposedly suck. My attention left the tv screen, and I turned to my laptop, putting the plate down and picking it up.

I opened it and noticed the Skype shortcut blinking. Clicking it I opened it up to a bit too many notifications, and missed calls. As I scroll through the notifications I noticed they all came from Kise's account.

"I'll be home in two days, what do you want?" I clicked on 'call back' and got an immediate response.

"Kagamicchi!"

"Kaga-chin!"

"Bakagami!"

"Taiga."

"Kagami.." I smiled as my miracles looked into the webcam straight at me.

"Yes? You all said my name, there must be something you want." I smirked and Ahomine came onscreen.

"Yeah! Sex!"

"Aominecchi! Keep your ding dong, in your damn pants until he gets home!" I saw a blonde head and a dark blue go flying after that. I chuckled lightly as Midori went and began to separate them using his lucky item which was a globe today.

Murasakibara then came up into view, smiling at me, so childishly.

And his adorable voice then spoke.

"I love you Kaga-chin." My head slowly fell back, and I rolled my eyes. I could only take so much of his adorable...EVERYTHING. I looked back at him nodding my head.

"I love you too Mura-mura."

Akashi then popped up on screen, his emperor eye showing. He's pissed.

"When are you coming home?" He asked bluntly, stare boring straight through me. He may be over 3,000 miles away but hell, his stare.

"In two days." I responded.

"You said that a week ago." Here we go again.

"I know and I'm sorry. But in all reality, I am going home in two days. I'll be back in your arms before you know it love." I attempted to smile, but the angry knit in his eyebrows wiped it right off my face.

"I hope so." He said bluntly before ending the call. I said I was sorry, things set me back. I'm only human. Sadly I don't think Akashi is. I shut down my laptop and head back out the door, cell phone in check and house all locked up.

I took a stroll to my favorite park, the one where mom used to take me when I'd have a shitty day. The moon wasn't visible where I was, but the street lights honed on the white snow on the ground, making some parts shine, like a sparkly blanket covering a cold child. I watched as couples passed, families played. I sat by the frozen park river, on an empty bench taking in my childhood sights.

"Excuse me sir, but do you mind if I sit here?" The voice I heard sounded that of male, and vaguely familiar, but I turned and smiled, lifting my hat from my eyes.

"Sure, you c-"

Silence fell, and I stared in disbelief.

"Hello Kagami-kun."


	4. I Don't Know

Sorry for such a late update everyone. The fact that I'm lacking computer is angering me very much.

But I'm also here to answer some of your review questions as well.

FanRan: Oh, they call each other by their last name to show possession. As for Kagami, since he's in America, he'll be calling everyone by their first name until he comes back home. Thank you for reviewing.

* * *

I don't know.

I just don't know.

I don't know how the hell I met Kuroko Tetsuya here in New York City.

I don't know how I let him talk me into going in the nearest coffee shop.

I don't know how I let him in again.

I just don't know.

But I think the worst part about this, is that I don't know how Akashi will react when he finds out what happened.

Because Akashi always knows.

And Akashi will always find out.

* * *

"_Your English is surprisingly good Kuroko._" I commented, trying to start a bit of small talk between us two. He had only sat there after we ordered our coffees, smiling at me with those wide blue orbs of his.

"_What? Why are you staring at me like that?" _I asked him. His stare was penetrating, and his smile, unnerving. He had me on the edge of my seat.

I've never seem him like this before. It scares me.

"_Oh no reason. I just missed you, Kagami-kun._"

I rolled my eyes. "_Kuroko, this is America. You don't add that alias to the end of my name._"

He smiled even brighter, and I swear, I could have gone blind.

"Gomen. I just missed you, is all." When he started speaking Japanese, I felt a little at ease. Even after my constant years in America, I was still a little self-conscious about my English.

"Well...I missed you too. I guess." He missed me? How the hell did he MISS me? He didn't miss me when he left me all a-fucking-lone that night so many years ago.

"Well how have you been?" The question came up suddenly after a few minutes and it scared me.

"How have I been? Eh..okay I guess. Being a journalist is a little tiring though." I tried not to make eye contact as he tried to warrant my attention.

"Well, how's the Kiseki No Sedai?" I choked on my coffee a bit, as my eyes traced his vile smirk. My eyes slowly moved to his as his eyes held an evil glare.

"I see them, every once and a while.." My gaze trailed to the window and I drank the rest of my coffee in a rushed way.

"Well Kuroko..I gotta-"

"No, Kagami-kun. Stay a while. I wish to talk to you some more." The grip he had on my wrist was killer, and I never felt anything like it before. Was he always this strong!? In high school, I remember him and his skills, but his strength was something that never registered on my mind before.

He gripped me a bit harder and had enough force to pull me right back into my seat. "Kuroko?!"

"_Please._ Stay for a little bit longer...Kagami-kun."

I didn't realize it before.

Not until I looked into his eyes.

His right, a light blue.

His left, yellow.

Hetero-chromatic eyes.

"Well, Kagami-kun. Tell me a little more about the Kiseki No Sedai please. I'd like to know how much you whore yourself to them."

My eyes went wide.

"Fucking, Kuroko...how the hell..."

"I have my ways dear Kagami-kun. I loved you so much, that I decided to do something about it. And now, with my eyes, I've traced all your closest steps, from high school, to college, to the very moment I stepped into your line of sight."

I steered my gaze away from his hetero-chromatic gaze and I shuddered. If only Akashi were here...

"So, Kagami-kun? What do you think?"

"Think about w-what?" I looked back at him, and regretted it instantly.

Why? I couldn't look away.

"About your little secret? How do you think the world would feel, if they found out the best-selling author in Japan and America, whores himself to the most memorable players of high school basketball, EVERYDAY?"

Fuck.

I'm fucked.

I'm so fucking fucked.

"I-I...Kuroko..."

"Well...?" He was expecting an answer.

An answer he already knew.

"What do you want from me?"

"Oh...hmm. Dear Taiga...it's not what. It's you."

* * *

"So what else Kagami-kun? Is there anything else you'd like to tell me?"

I had to do what I was told. And he knew it. I just had too, or else, not only would my career be ruined, but the ones I love will also be hurt in the process.

"I hate you," I spat as we walked down the street back to my mother's sky-high apartment. I heard him giggle, as his fingers entwined with mine. Regrettably, I held his hand. People passing by, smiled at us, and told us how cute we were as a couple. Kuroko, that little shit, smiled and said thank you, as I grudgingly pulled a smile, and nodded as they passed by.

He then laughed once the coast was clear, and there were no more people to compliment our disgusting reunion.

"No you don't."

"Yes I do, you tiny little shit." He looked at me, and instant pain ran through my body. I held my breathe as my face began to turn red. It felt like the wind was suddenly knocked out of me, and his steel-chain grip got even tighter.

"Ah, ah, ah, Taiga. You shouldn't talk so rudely to your boyfriend, now should you?"

"You bastard. I fucking hate you. You're not my boyfriend."

He only giggled again, as I got up from the ground, my hand still entwined with his.

"_Oh you hate me? Oh sweetheart, you never hated me. You still_ _don't._" I cringed. His English made me sick to my stomach.

He soon switched back to Japanese and laughed again.

"Kimoi. Kimoi."

"Gross?" I questioned.

"You're so gross, Kagami-kun. I can't believe you'd lie to my face and say you hate me."

What..?!

"You never hated me. In all reality, you still love me. Deep in your whorish heart, you STILL love me."

"But it looks like you're not in reality, at all, Kuroko.." I retorted.

His response caused me to black out, and the only thing I could remember was the last line he said.

"Oh, but this is reality, Taiga-dear. My reality."


End file.
